Although it may be the case that unhealthy 4’s tend to bother other Enneagram types, this is true for all unhealthy personality types. Each of the types come with their own set of negative traits that can either be improved or indulged.
If a type 4 decides to indulge in their negative traits, they can be disliked by others. This does however not mean that they do not have any good qualities; in fact, they have many excellent qualities.
Let’s have a look at Enneagram type 4’s in more detail.
The Individualist - Enneagram Fours
The Enneagram type 4 is more commonly known as the Individualist, particularly because they are driven by a sense of individuality. They are known as the sensitive introspective type and can be expressive, dramatic and self absorbed, with a very strong craving for individuality.
Because they have such a driving urge to be unique, they can be perceived as selfish. They demand that things need to be done their way in their time, purely in an effort to avoid anything mundane or normal. In this quest they can often discard anything that is perfectly good, simply because it is normal. They will forgo efficiency and effectiveness in their quest for individuality, which can frustrate other types.
On the other hand, 4’s can be emotionally very honest and refreshing and are often very creative. Healthy 4’s realize their shortcomings and can be exceptionally open and honest about these, analyzing themselves from an objective point of view. In this honesty, they can gather strength to withstand hardship that many other types cannot.
How to deal with a Individualist
Well, if you are in a relationship with a type 4, or have to deal with them on a professional basis, there are several things you can do to make your life easier. The healthier the type 4 is, the easier this will be.
- Appreciating their unique abilities and the distinctive personality they have created with care over the years, will get you quite far.
- Encourage them to take the Enneagram test at the Enneagram Test Queen, to better understand their personality type.
- Be forthcoming and understanding. Even though they may seem strong, type 4’s have a lot going on and are often quite tough on themselves.
How to cope as a type 4
As a type 4, you may find life quite tough, especially if you are still defining your sense of self and figuring out how to navigate life without losing your individuality. There are a couple of things that can help you along the way:
- Try to not take your feelings too seriously, they are usually not a source of inspiration and evaluating them from a rational perspective before you act, can save you a lot of trouble.
- Self-confidence comes from positive experiences, so allow yourself to have some…the positive internal feedback will do you the world of good.
- Try to avoid the emotionally exploitive experiences created by addictions and debaucherous experiences. Try self discipline and a form of routine instead.
- Try to avoid those long negative conversations with yourself and aim to have a positive experience instead.